Home?

May 1st will mark five years that I've lived in Memphis. Incredibly, five years is the longest I've spent living in one place. Growing up, I lived in Indianapolis, St. Louis, a small town in Alabama, Nashville and now Memphis.

I moved to Memphis when I was sixteen, but for the past five years, it's never really felt like home. Honestly, when people ask me where I'm from, I never know how to answer. I usually just say that I was born in Indianapolis but now I live in Tennessee. I definitely don't consider myself to be "from the South" even though I've spent 13 out of my 21 years living in the South. I guess a part of me will always consider the Nashville area "home" just because I lived there during my high school years, so I feel like my most formidable years were spent there. But, I moved from Nashville and haven't been back in over a year. It obviously isn't my home any more.

In four months, I'll be leaving Memphis to move to Budapest, Hungary. Now that I'm mentally preparing myself for leaving Memphis, this city has started to feel a bit more like home to me. Weird, right? Now that I'm leaving, I finally feel at home in Memphis. I'm beginning to recognize things I'll miss: my favorite park, my drive home from work, my favorite dessert spot, Redbirds games...I've never truly appreciated these things until the past week or so.



I think part of the reason I haven't felt at home in Memphis is because I never expected to be here long. Nevertheless, I've lived here for nearly five years--longer than any other place I've lived--and now I'm moving. Soon, Budapest will be "home" and Memphis will be where I come back to visit family. I'm super excited about this transition and truly can't wait to be living and working in Hungary.
 But, I'm left wondering how long it'll take until Budapest feels like "home" to me. It took five years of living in Memphis for it to even begin to feel like my home. How long will Budapest take? I'm moving somewhere where I don't even speak the language.  Everything about living in a city will be new to me--especially public transportation. I'm eager for this change to come, yet I expect many struggles along the way. I'll settle eventually, and everything that's new will soon become familiar to me. It'll feel like "home" sooner or later.

This upcoming transition has me thinking about what really makes a place "home." I don't think it's just where someone lives. I still hold onto Nashville as being at least partly my home. I think it's the people and the memories and the experiences that make a place home. Living in Memphis, I've struggled a lot and I think that's why it hasn't felt like home until recently. My life in Nashville was completely different, and I have much better memories of my years spent there. That's why it still feels like my home. Now that I've grown to appreciate Memphis more, I can finally consider it to be more like home to me.

Nevertheless, none of the cities that I've lived in are truly my home. I know that one day Jesus will return and believers will be brought up to spent eternity with Him. Whether in Heaven or the New Earth, I'll be at my true home when Christ returns. I won't have to struggle with identifying my home. It won't take me five years to settle down and finally consider Heaven "home." I won't be homesick because I'll be in my eternal home. The struggles that I'm encountering now pending my transition to living in a new country won't exist when I'm finally home where I belong. For now, I'll take the confusion and difficulties associated with this home because Christ gives us hope for an eternal home with Him.

January 2017 Recap

January went by so quickly! It seems like we just celebrated Christmas, yet it's already the end of January. I thought it'd be fun to do a monthly recap of what I learned, what I read, and what my goals are for the next month. We'll see if I can be consistent in this throughout 2017.

What I'm Learning

Lately, God has been teaching me to worry less and trust more. I feel like this is something I have to remind myself of constantly, but lately, it's been less of a struggle. I used to full on freak out whenever I thought about my future, and now, thinking about what the next year holds is so exciting. Sure, it's a little scary, but God has really worked in my heart so that my default is to trust Him rather than to question Him. Trust more, worry less. This is what I'm learning.

I'm also learning Hungarian. Never thought I'd say that. It's hard, and I feel like I'm failing most of the time, but I'm trying. I just want to at least be  familiar with the language before I move to Budapest. I don't expect to learn all that much on my own. I plan to find a teacher to help me learn it once I move there. Until then, I'm sort of on my own. A friend of mine is also learning, so she helps me, but I'm definitely looking forward to having access to a Hungarian teacher when I move to Hungary later this year.




What I Read
I really enjoyed getting to read each of these books. Sandy Toes is probably my favorite that I read this month simply because it's the newest book in a series that I have loved since I was 15.

                   

 

Goals for February

• Complete MPD training
• Read Looming Transitions by Amy Young
• Make it through at least 2 more chapters of my Hungarian textbook
• Finish my study on Proverbs (using Journible and the inductive study method)
• Journal at least 5 times (trying to be better at this!)

30 Things That Make Me Smile

I came across a blog prompt entitled "30 Things That Make Me Smile." Given all the sad, scary stuff I've been hearing on the news, I thought listing things (so, no people included in this list) that make me smile sounded like a fantastic idea. Here goes!

1. Warm weather
2. Books
3. Coffee
4. Hugs
5. "I love you."
6. Playing with kids
7. Lazy Saturday mornings
8. Teaching
9. Airports (yep, I'm weird)
10. Meaningful conversations
11. Watching baseball
12. Giving gifts
13. Organization
14. Pretty art
15. Old family pictures
16. Surprises
17. Music
18. Random acts of kindness
19. Hoodies
20. Scripture
21. Long walks alone with good music
22. Children's laughter
23. Freshly washed sheets
24. Fall
25. Random texts from old friends
26. People watching
27. Reading to kids
28. Gluten-free menus at restaurants
29.  Board game parties
30. Hearing kids I babysit for yell, "Dani!" when I walk through the door

Random Music Post: iPhone on Shuffle

I came across a blog post prompt on Pinterest that suggesting putting your phone on shuffle and listing the first ten songs to play. Thought it'd be fun to try! My music tastes are basically all over the place (except country...never country music!)

1.Pol Roger--Jimmy Eat World

2. No Far Away--Chris August

3. Take It All--Adele

4. Love Alone is Worth the Fight--Switchfoot

5. Stay--Kygo

6. Otherside--Red Hot Chili Peppers

7. Strangers Here--Tenth Avenue North

8. A Little Too Not Over You--David Archuleta (wow, throwback!)

9. Take it All--Hillsong

10. Closer to Me--The Fray

{Book Review} "Fleeing ISIS, Finding Jesus" by Charles Morris and Craig Borlase

Rating: 4/5

Fleeing ISIS, Finding Jesus: The Real Story of God at Work is a book inspired by the question "Is this the end of Christianity in the Middle East?" After reading a New York Times article with this title, Morris and Borlase wanted to seek out answers. Travelling to Turkey, Jordan and Iraq, they conducted interviews with many refugees who have been forced to flee from ISIS. The true stories from those interviews have been compiled in this book.

Fleeing ISIS, Finding Jesus tells story after story of men, women and children who have been forced to leave their lives behind in search of safety from ISIS militants. The unique thing about each of these stories is how Jesus has revealed Himself to them. In the midst of utter chaos and destruction, these men and women have stories of their conversions from Islam to Christianity after hearing of Jesus in refugee camps, from fellow captives, or in dreams. The resounding answer to the question of whether or not Christianity is dying in the Middle East is most definitely, "No!" To hear all about how God is using the persecution of Christians in the Middle East to spread the gospel, you simply need to read this book. While many of the stories are heartbreaking, it is also incredible to read about the power God has in the midst of such violence in destruction. It's easy for Western Christians to say we trust Christ; it's amazing to read of stories of believers in hostile communities living out their faith.

While Morris and Borlase write about sensitive issues, they do so with great care. The true stories of persecution are heartbreaking to read, but also incredible because within each story, Jesus' power to save is woven. This is a book that will make you more aware of the persecution that Christians are facing in the Middle East. It's a hard read, but it's definitely a book worth reading.

I received an eARC of this book in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

{Book Review} "Counter Culture: Following Christ in an Anti-Christian Age" by David Platt

Rating: 5/5

Counter Culture highlights many social issues that inflict the world today, and author David Platt writes from the perspective of how Christians should handle such issues. Platt originally published Counter Culture in 2014 but he has updated this edition to include new issues, such as the refugee crisis. Touching on important topics, such as abortion, sex trafficking, marriage, racial tension and the orphan crisis, Platt gives readers a clear understanding of how Christians are to respond to these issues. Counter Culture is basically a call to action for Christians to counter the way the culture handles social issues. To be sure, the way the gospel compels us to respond to these issues definitely counters the way popular culture thinks of these issues.

Each chapter ends with a "pray" section that lists specific prayer points regarding the issue that is discussed in each chapter. Next, there's a "participate" section that gives readers ideas on how they can get involved in working to help solve the issue presented, and then there's a "proclaim" section that guides readers to truths from Scripture relating to the topic of the chapter. Additionally, the book's companion website provides more resources with suggestions on what Christians can do to get involved in countering the culture on these issues. 

Counter Culture is a great book because Platt's passion for the issues shine through, and he expertly educates readers on important issues facing society today. He doesn't stop there though. Platt uses Counter Culture to call Christians to action--to not just read about the issues and then move on, but rather, he wants to see Christians living out their faith by using their talents to address the issues that God calls them to. Platt uses the gospel to demonstrate why Christians are called to counter culture. This is a great read for Christians wondering how to handle the issues we see daily. 

A Bible study is also available to go along with this book. For details, you can visit Counterculturebook.com 

I received an eARC of this title in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

Current Favorite Quotes

I love words, and over the years, there have been a lot of quotes that I've fallen in love with. Here's a roundup of some of my current favorite quotes that I've come across on Pinterest.

Favorite Travel Quote

Favorite Literary Quote

Favorite Reading Quote

Favorite Love Quote

Favorite Spiritual Quote

When Bop-It Makes me Ponder Obedience to God

Remember Bop-It? I loved this game as a kid. I remember always trying to do better than my brothers at it. Now, there's a new version with lots of new features. Recently, I was teaching some kiddos how Bop-It works. As expected, the youngest one had trouble remembering what to do when certain instructions were given. The Bop-It game would make random remarks whenever someone failed to do what it said. One thing that I realized it says is "It's not that hard; just do what I say." I heard that phrase several times throughout the day as the kids practiced their Bop-It skills.

Video Source

That phrase got me thinking. It's a fairly simple idea: "It's not that hard; just do what I say." As a nanny, I think this same thought often. When I ask kids to put their shoes away and they end up in the middle of the kitchen, I wonder where my instructions got confused in the little one's mind. I find myself thinking "It's not that hard; just do what I say."

As often as I think this while I'm working with kids, I imagine God thinks it constantly about me. God's Word clearly instructs us on what is right and wrong; we are to do and what we aren't. Yet, I struggle. I know that self-sufficiency is a sin, yet I find myself continually depending on myself instead of trusting God. I worry even though I know that God says to "Cast all of our anxiety on Him" (1 Peter 5:7a). I have an incredibly hard time following God's instructions in specific areas in my life, even though I know how I should handle those areas.  I know I'm supposed to love others, but sometimes, it's hard. I know that God commands me to forgive when people have hurt me, but again, that can be difficult! When I fail, I know there's grace upon grace, but I also wonder if God is thinking, "Just do what I say." He knows what's best for me. He has a plan for my life, yet I flounder and try to do things on my own because I forget. Life gets overwhelming and sometimes I try to keep up on my own, and I inevitably crash and burn (that's also usually how a game of Bop-It ends for me!)

Playing Bop-It with a four year old reminded me that even though we know what we're to do, we still fail.  However, when Bop-It shames the user for failing, I'm also reminded of God's amazing grace because even when I fail time and time again, there's new grace for each situation as He continues to mold me into the person He wants me to be. I know how to play Bop-It, but I still lose often. I know how to follow God, but I still fall short at times.

When Bop-It says "It's not that hard; just do what I say," I'm reminded that sometimes, it is hard, and there's grace for our failures, and the promise that God will continue to work in our lives.

Lately: Social Media Fast and Learning to Disconnect

A couple of weeks ago, I felt a really strong urge to take a break from social media. Anyone that knows me, knows I spend too much time on my phone. I have a friend that hates smartphones because they take up too much of people's time. I wish I could be like her. Unfortunately, I'm pretty attached to my iPhone.

In an attempt to connect more with my family over Christmas, I deleted Instagram, Snapchat and Facebook from my phone for seven days. Wow. That taught me a lot. For starters, I realized just how many times a day I pick up my phone to get on some form of social media. During my social media fast, I would pick up my phone, unlock it, and then realize that the app I was going to get on isn't on my phone any more. I'd put my phone away, and repeat the process a short time later. It was ridiculous! I had no idea I used my social media apps that much, but when I no longer had them, I realized how often I turn to them for entertainment: when I'm in line at the store, when I'm waiting for food at a restaurant, when I'm waiting for my coffee to brew...it's absurd how often I get on my phone!

After the first couple of days, I began to realize I really didn't miss the apps much: I missed the constant entertainment. I can never be bored if I have an abundance of social media posts to peruse. Without social media, I began to choose other ways to spend my free time: reading more (because clearly I needed more time to read), talking with friends in person instead of through social media, playing games with my family. It was great. All because I deleted a few apps off my phone.

Not only did deleting my social media apps change how I spent my time, it also caused my thinking to shift. Instead of thinking, "this would make a good Instagram shot" when I was doing something, I simply enjoyed my time. It changed the way I thought about my life because there was zero pressure to take a cute picture or come up with a clever caption because it simply doesn't matter. That change in thinking was shocking to me because I never even realized I had been thinking that way to begin with.

Image Source

I found this quote while Googling social media statistics and I really like this guy's advice.

After the week ended, it was nice to be able to download the apps again and browse. However, I've decided on a couple of changes I want to make: social media can no longer be the first thing I check in the morning, nor can it be the last thing I do before going to bed. I don't want my days starting or ending that way. Rather, I now read a devotional first thing in the morning, and read whatever book I'm working on at night. 

I decided that I'm going to take a social media break one week out of every month for the next several months. I'm sure it will become easier and easier the more I do it. It sure was a struggle when I did it a few weeks ago. I can definitely say the experience grew me and revealed a lot about my thinking to myself.

It feels appropriate to end this post with this Albert Einstein quote. I've always appreciated this quote, yet I often forget the implications of it.

Hello, 2017

A friend recently told me that she isn't a big fan of New Year's Eve because it's so anticlimactic. I'm inclined to agree. Everyone stays up late eagerly anticipating the New Year, and then one? We all go to bed at some point and wake up to a day that feels just like any other. Some people set New Year's Resolutions, but of course, those don't usually last long. I know they never do for me. The past couple of years, I haven't even set specific resolutions simply because I knew I wouldn't stick with them. What's the point in setting myself up for failure?

Instead of writing a list of resolutions, or changes, I'd like to make for 2017, I want to write a list of what I'm looking forward to about 2017.

Growing in my relationship with God
This is my goal for every new year. With every passing year, I want to be continually growing in my love for the Lord, and my knowledge of His goodness. No matter what 2017 brings, I can always turn to God to deepen my relationship with Him.

Reading good books
That's a given. I spend so much time reading, and I'm excited for another year of endless hours spent between the pages of incredible books.

Travelling 
I don't even know where I'll end up this year, but just the thought of travelling makes me smile, so it's definitely something I'm eagerly anticipating in 2017. I wonder where I'll go for my first trip? I don't even know yet.

Learning 
I hope that 2017 is a year filled of learning for me. With the plans that I have for the fall, I can already say that I'll be learning a lot about living in a new culture and attempting to learn a new language. Without a doubt, I'm sure that 2017 will be filled with many learning experiences, and I can't wait. 

So much more
Thinking about the future used to scare me to death. Now, I'm so, so excited about this year that it doesn't even terrify me that there are so many unknowns about what it will hold. I'm excited for the things above, and so much more. I'm sure 2017 will be filled with hard, challenging things, but it will also hold lots of exciting opportunities.

I'm ready for you, 2017.

2016 Reading Review

This is the first year ever that I've kept a reading log of the books I read throughout the year. I set out with a goal of reading 10,000 pages this year. I'm happy to share I surpassed that goal! I actually reached it back in September or October. Here's a recap of the books I read in 2016. I've posted reviews of most of them--you can check those out under the "book reviews" tab.

Nonfiction

Bronner by Sherri Burgess

Called for Life by Kent and Amber Brantly

And It Was Beautiful by Kara Tippets

Synced by Jennifer Kennedy Dean

Honestly by Daniel Fusco

Chase Away Cancer by Ellie Poole Ewoldt

Live Smart by Dan Dumas

Saving my Assassin by Virginia Prodan

Reset by Nick Hall

Home by Elyse Fitzpatrick

13 Hours in Benghazi by Mitchell Zuckoff

The God Ask by Steve Shadrach

Befriend by Scott Sauls

Shaken by Tim Tebow

The Missing Matisse by Pierre Matisse

This Side of Infamy by Jim Downing

The Spirituality of Fundraising by Henri Nouwen

Fiction 

Hope Harbor by Irene Hannon

Step by Step by Candace Calvert

Every Girl Gets Confused by Janice Thompson

Cold Shot by Dani Pettrey

What Happened on Beale Street by Mary Ellis

Deadlock by DiAnne Mills

Burning Proof by Janice Cantore

Traces of Guilt by Dee Henderson

God's Not Dead 2 by Travis Thrasher

Dressed for Death by Julianna Deering

From the Start by Melissa Tagg

Like Never Before by Melissa Tagg

Her One and Only by Becky Wade

Taken by Dee Henderson

The Help by Kathryn Stockett

The Promise of Jesse Woods by Chris Fabry

Deadly Encounter by DiAnn Mills

Attracted to Fire by DiAnn Mills

Catching Heat by Janice Cantore

The Domino Effect by Davis Bunn

Divergent by Veronica Roth

Insurgent by Veronica Roth

Vendetta by Lisa Harris

Missing by Lisa Harris

Someone Like You by Victoria Bylin

Still Life by Dani Pettrey

If I'm Found by Terri Blackstock

Conspiracy of Silence by Ronie Kendig

Total pages: 14, 193